by Rev. Michael Heath | Aug 5, 2018
Emotional dumping or displacement is when a partner gets angry at his/her mate and unfairly unloads frustration on him/her even though s/he is completely or mostly innocent. Misplaced anger is a common problem married folks often experience. The resentment caused by it can build up and over time, lead to ever more serious relational strife. Fortunately, a couple the basics of psychological dynamics can go a long way to prevent and avoid emotional dumping. Here are some tips for both the “dumper” and the innocent victim.
by Rev. Michael Heath | Jul 23, 2018
In recent years, the term “porn addiction” has become a common and colloquial way of referring to a compulsive behavior related to the viewing pornographic imagery.
While the term porn addiction neither meets the medical criterion for an addiction nor is it a recognized diagnostic category in the DSM 5, there is no doubt that in recent years pornography has become the source of a serious and growing problem in many marriages. Unfortunately, many approaches either minimize or condemn the issue without really understanding or healing the damage using pornography can do to a marriage.
by Rev. Michael Heath | Jul 10, 2018
A new New York State law mandates that public schools to teach mental health in physical education and health classes. As a mental health counselor, I am overjoyed and want to explain why this long overdue directive is so vitally needed. Historically, mental illness has been feared and avoided in the public mind. ven more important than, the specific information that the classes will provide is the modeling of open discussion which breaks the silence which has long surrounded mental health issues. Fear and ignorance are perpetuated by the absence of discussion where in sharing feelings, questions and concerns is acceptable. Having programs which explicitly address not only facts but also feelings and cultural attitudes can go a long way to normalize and make comfortable talking about things which were heretofore implicitly forbidden or, at least, very uncomfortable.
by Rev. Michael Heath | Jun 26, 2018
One of the most important achievements a successful marriage can attain is COUPLE’S CONSCIOUSNESS. That is to say, each person in the relationship transforms his or her fundamental self-understanding from being an individual to being a part of a greater whole in a coupled partnership. If you feel that your marriage hasn’t attained a robust couple’s consciousness, here are some tips to assist you get there:
by Rev. Michael Heath | Jun 11, 2018
In the wake of two celebrity suicides, the media is filled with commentary regarding why people , especially successful people, do it. It is unfortunate that the public eye only turns to this tragedy when it involves a famous person. Indeed, the suicide rate is climbing at an alarming rate in America. Also troubling is that a death of someone like Anthony Bourdain demonstrates, even when it looks to others like an individual has everything in the world going his/her way, no one ever really knows the inner turmoil or demons with which folks struggle. Having inner turmoil is one thing but obviously everyone who has turmoil doesn’t kill themselves. Do you have to be crazy to kill yourself ?
by Rev. Michael Heath | May 28, 2018
Memorial Day can be an opportunity to remember those important people in our lives who have sacrificed for us and died. It also can be a time to revisit and review the pain and losses in our own lives and place them into a broader perspective. Looking back can be a powerful way not only to ease the pain of grief but also to discover the transcendent meaning and purpose in our lives which may have been lost in the wake of death and tragedy.
by Rev. Michael Heath | May 13, 2018
Mother’s Day is a time to honor and express our love for our moms. For many it is a time to remember and give thanks. For others, however, whose mothers abused, neglected or abandoned them, this holiday is a painful occasion. If your mom wasn’t so hot, here are some tips to help you cope with this difficult holiday and to discover and appreciate a deeper and more profound meaning of motherhood which is not tied to any one person. In addition to being a special day for individuals, it is also an important symbol which expresses the universal human need for emotional and physical nurturing and kindness.
by Rev. Michael Heath | May 2, 2018
May is Mental Health Awareness month . While progress has bee made in public awareness, misleading myths persist. The outdated medical model has created confusion and unnecessary fears with the sharply dividing categories of healthy and sick. Seeing mental health on a continuum which ranges from rational to irrational is a better way to understand both emotional well being and being emotionally disordered.
by Rev. Michael Heath | Apr 17, 2018
Name-calling is one of the most destructive human tendencies. When name-calling happens frequently between partners in marriage, however, the emotional consequences can be devastating and the lasting effects ruinous for the relationship.
Fortunately, there is a process by which individuals and couples can learn to stop name-calling . Here are the basic steps that, with practice, can transform hurtful arguments into intimacy building, constructive discussions:
by Rev. Michael Heath | Apr 2, 2018
A long winter of neglect and putting off needed repairs can take a toll on our homes. So too, disregard and a lack of effort can damage marriages and intimate relationships. Taking some time and paying some attention is needed to put them back in tip top shape. Here are some good tips .
